To be loved

At this point in my life, I'm always missing someone. With grandchildren on opposite coasts, my heart is constantly longing. It's so strange when you become a grandparent, isn't it? You look into the faces of these new little humans, and you see traces of people you've loved - tiny wisps of familiarity and home in the corners of their eyes or dimples on chins and cheeks. I often wonder how my own mother was so great at balancing her needs with mine when I started having children. At times there is a part of me that desperately wants a do-over when it comes to parenting. I made so many mistakes. Missed opportunities and failures threaten to squeeze my chest until I can hardly breathe, even as I type this. But there is also beauty in seeing my children parent their own little ones. My role as Mimi still feels new to me, and I remind myself that I carry the lessons I've learned into this new season. My job is to delight and pour my love into the next generation, hoping that my influence will help them know how amazing they are. And isn't that what all of us want, really? To be loved like that?